i would not be how i am today, who i am today, if i had not spent the past five years being single. singlehood has deepened me, has given me awareness of my own self (which brings truer awareness of the world around me), has stretched me, taught me, strengthened me, held me. being single has been a beautiful gift. i would not have chosen to be single and yet i would not give back my single years for anything. they are mine and they are beyond price. being single has brought great treasures.
i love relationship, growing and learning and wrestling and loving and laughing with a partner. i love holding and caring for and giving to another. i love having someone with whom to celebrate, to mourn. i love intimacy and sensuality and romance and sharing a bed. i like being skin to skin. i love relationship even though it is messy and difficult and requires hard work.
and yet.
being single was necessary for my coming to be who i am and how. it was necessary for me to discover what i have inside that is always with me, that gives me a sense of being no matter what is happening around me or seemingly to me.
funny, i would have paid any price to have avoided living single for five years, and now i would not accept any price for it not to have happened.
Saturday, February 04, 2006
single
photography by permission cindy lee jones
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11 comments:
I agree. Being on one's own brings out facets of our personality we never knew existed. And whatever the pitfalls of loneliness, you start celebrating being who you can be. :)
Well-written. :)
thank you, blue. i couldn't have imagined being so happy, so busy, so fulfilled being single (but then, one is a whole number). if i should continue to be single the rest of my days (which could happen), i can accept that. and if i again am in couplehood, i will be certain to set aside time regularly for my time of being alone. thank you for sharing this with me.
diana christine
this is all about the learning process of life
thank you for taking the time to answer the question posed on my blog. i enjoyed reading this post very much. having spent a long time single myself i understand that feeling u speak of.
:)
charming words you write. as always.
I believe that life's longest and most difficult journey involves being at peace with one's self. Being single, if only for a short time, can only enhance the process.
Thank you for reminding us of the purity of joy one can experience in hearing one's self out.
I should speak bravely and say that many of us are cowards, preferring to be in a bad form of 2 than to face life as 1 where even the world can be potentially at your feet. The latter is of course difficult to realize when your self is consumed by...other "issues".
This post is refreshing and liberating. You show absolute maturity and wisdom in your writings.
being single can really turn out to be a boon..but for that one has to love oneself, have faith in oneself.
very well expressed. :)
I appreciate your words of enlightenment. As a single male, I can understand how this would also be beneficial to me, in exploring the possibilities of self-reliance and awareness. Well said.
Well expressed! Very inspiring and very true:)
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